Dear Friend,

Do you remember the first time that we met? Although it’s not clear as day, I still remember you sitting in-front me with your long bob dark brown hair, brown eyes looking down at the immaculate self-portrait you drew. What a beautiful picture, I said, the next day we became best friends. It was destiny, you and me, we were an astronomy.

We used to be so loud in the morning, like those peppy talk show host with ounces of coffee. The lonesome wolf days were over for us, we were enjoying the conversations we had of the boys we liked, and doing the hobbies that defined who we truly are. We were so happy sneaking into the music classroom to check whether the piano worked or not, you were playing the keys while I suggested another song from the princesses we drew resemblance.

Wasn’t it fun when we were running down the rumored haunted corridors? Singing in the staircase, calling for the phantom that never appeared between the empty rooms of the decaying monastery. There used to be around seven of us, inseparable for two-years until the classes became more serious, and an uncertain future was in the present taunting us.

You and I, we kept pushing through. Met your first love, and lost friends too. He didn’t deserve you, nor did she, should’ve told her off when I could, a kiss between a boy isn’t meaningless when a friend’s heart is involved too. Your heart was broken, and it shattered worse, when your parents announced their divorce.

Held your hand when the tears kept falling, whispered I am sorry not knowing what to say. Sticked together for the rest of our four-years, dreamt of a foreign country you made it first to. Almost went with you, but I had to hold back when my family needed me at home.

From seven we went to three, and I didn’t tell you, but my heart-ached when I wasn’t invited at some point to your gatherings. I kept quiet, ate alone, until the afternoon the three of us reunited to continue to talk about the boys we hate and new hobbies we discovered over the summer. Had so much fun at the picnic you threw just for me, strawberry, baguettes and buttercream reminding you of your time in Madrid.

Inspired by your stories of Spanish city, I packed my bags and books towards a new destiny in Washington, DC. I apologize for disappearing for six months, I should have written you text messages or sent a few reels to let you know you were in my thoughts. Can I also admit I was conflicted? The day before I left I had to choose between you and our dearest friend. Don’t you remember we were the ones that said farewell before you flew to make your dreams come true? I was alone at the airport, wish you and her were there to bid farewell to me too.

When you look back at that silly argument, yes, you’re reading this right, was it really worth losing a friend? Now that we are older, do you think we can amend the past? Promise to call you at least once a year, and I’ll understand if you’re too busy to watch a horror film like we did back then.

I apologize for the separate birthdays, outings, and conversations, you did right at ignoring the invitations. Should have listened to your side, agree to disagree, or better yet, forget the past, because I loved you anyway. Now I only get updates through the phone, watch you build a life on your own, as I exclaim “Oh my God!”, you finally seem happy.

Can I admit something before the closing? I am jealous of your new best friend and soon to husband, they get to see you succeed in-person, while I sit at home longing to hear the bell you’ll soon ring when you finally pick the white dress you wished at the well. You’ll be the most beautiful bride, a divine wife to your special guy, and a mother to kindest children you’ll raise them to be.

Do you think we still have time? May I call you up? Even if I only hear you say «hi», before hanging up on your unreliable friend. Am I still even in your contact list? Cause I got stories to tell you, I am leaving soon to the one place you felt right at home. Please don’t make me send anonymous post-cards from this new unknown city, I want to sign my name with a heart and smile, and ask you how and where you are. Don’t want to make it to five years without being in your life, may I please come back after all this time?